I have one week left in Moldova. I have even less time left in my village, which makes this week feel shorter than 7 days. This is definitely a bitter-sweet time for me. My mind is basically out the door, around the corner, and across the street. But I find my heart clinging to the familiar right now, as my surroundings – particularly my room – come crashing down around me. Ok, obviously I’m being a little dramatic, nothing is crashing, but my safe haven, the place that I retreat to when I’m feeling overwhelmed, lonely, lost, or just reflective, will soon not be mine anymore.
This is such a weird feeling. I will be traveling for the next couple of months throughout Eurasia before heading back home, and while I feel so excited, lucky, and blessed to get to conclude my Peace Corps service with such an amazing adventure, there is something very liberating and terrifying, all at the same time, about traveling with only the belongings on your back. Maybe like being in an anti gravity chamber; the beauty is that there’s nothing to weigh you down and prevent you from going anywhere but the horror is that there’s nothing to ground you if you want to take control of your own body.
I also don’t really know how to say goodbye to the people most important to me in my village. Yes I’d like to come back eventually, but I don’t know when, if ever, that will be. As much as I’ve enjoyed my time here, I feel like I need some distance from it. I feel like I am ready to start a new chapter of my life and shift my focus to different ventures. It’s interesting to see that some of the volunteers that started a year before me have already come back to visit their villages. I know that this won’t be me. This is partly what makes saying goodbye so difficult. The other difficult part is that everyone around me is in their normal routine, which makes my life seem that much more chaotic right now since I am no longer a part of the routine. I definitely want to take the time to say a proper goodbye to certain people, but a little part of me just wants to leave them be and sneak out the back door while no one is looking.
As I mentioned earlier, I will be traveling for the next two months to several countries in Europe, and Western and Central Asia. A significant amount of this journey will be on my own, which is by far the most extensive traveling I have done alone, so this will be another adventure in and of itself. I have treasured all of the positive feedback I’ve gotten about this blog from near and far, and via online or through word of mouth. I would very much like to continue blogging about my travels, and, if possible, I will do so. I will have limited access to the internet depending on where I am so I plan to hopefully collect my thoughts gradually and put them online when I have the opportunity.
Thank you to all that have taken the time to read and follow my blog. This medium has been a great way for me to separate my thoughts and often find the good in a seemingly negative situation. In that respect, you have all helped me through this process over the last two years and for that I will forever be grateful.